Rollercoasters... do you scream?

I've always been one of those people who loves a good rollercoaster.  The thrill of the speed and the twist, turns, drops and the loops, have always gotten my heart racing in the "I'm-so-excited-I-could-squeal" kind of way, as opposed to "I'm-screaming-and-crying-and-I-want-to-get-off".  Heck, I've always been a bit of a speed demon - I had the opportunity to take a spin around Symmons Plains in one of the V8 Utes in June this year, and grinned my little face off the whole way.  My driver, a friend from way back, warned me to give him the thumbs down if I wanted him to back off - instead I saw him glance my way on the straight and just chuckle.

But sometimes life sends you on a rollercoaster you hadn't prepared for.  Which makes me wonder - do I really love them, or am I just able to mentally prepare myself for all the twists and turns so that I cope?

This week has been a proper rollercoaster.  A win with a patient at work, who we thought for sure had taken a turn for the worse.  Up.  Witnessing a woman who I think of as a mentor be disrespected and humiliated.  Down.  A friend giving birth to her much-awaited baby daughter.  Up.  

And then, the clincher. 

A friend and colleague, diagnosed with breast cancer in her early 30's.

Boom.  That's rock bottom, right there.

I had no words.  No emotion.  No tears.  Just numbness.  And I am both grateful and heartbroken that the news came second-hand, and I didn't have to process and try to find something both adequately sympathetic and supportive on the spot.  This woman is a beautiful, caring, generous soul who is selfless and unconditionally supportive of me on my journey.  It breaks my heart that now she must go through a horrendous journey of her own.  She is a sister, a mother, a wife, a friend, and though I am by no means a religious woman, I pray that the strength of character and will that she will need in the coming weeks and months is close by.

Sometimes the rollercoaster is fun.  Other times it scares you senseless.  But I guess that's half the fun of living - you get on, not really knowing what kind of ride you are about to have.